Category Archives: Relationship

What To Do When Your Spouse Asks For a Divorce

Few people go into marriage with a plan for what they will do if it ends. If you are fighting all the time and aren’t able to resolve your problems on your own, though, the possibility of divorce may come up in an argument. When that happens, it’s important to know how to respond.

Get Clarification

The first thing you want to do if your partner drops divorce into the conversation is to understand how serious he or she is about it. In the heat of an argument, tempers can run so hot that people say things they don’t mean. On the other hand, intense discussions can also bring up issues that the other person has been considering for a long time and just didn’t know how to tell you. Finding out exactly where you stand is essential for knowing how to move forward.

Get Counseling

If the mention of divorce is a cry for help, you probably would benefit from talking to a professional about it. Find a reputable marriage counselor near you. The therapist needs to be a good match for both of you, so it may take a while to find the right person, but he or she provides a neutral third party viewpoint to help you navigate and resolve your problems.

Get an Attorney

When the mention of divorce turns out to be more of an announcement than a question, it’s time to find an advocate. No matter how civil you think you and your partner will be during the proceedings, hiring your own Fairfax divorce lawyer is necessary. Your attorney can help you file the right paperwork and advise you to ensure you get your fair share when all is said and done.

Hearing that your spouse is thinking about divorce can be devastating. It doesn’t always mean the same thing the first time someone says it, though. Clarify what he or she means, and loop in the right professionals to help you.

Questions to Discuss Before Marriage

Marriage is a big commitment to enter into. You’re giving your life to someone else and promising to be there for that person forever. It can be scary, especially with the high rates of divorce, but being realistic about things can help ensure you have a strong relationship. Here are a few things you should discuss prior to walking down the aisle. 

Will You Have Kids?

Although you don’t necessarily need to plan out how many you’ll have and when you’ll have them, it’s a good idea to know whether your partner wants children at all. If you are going to have kids, you may want to think about going to a Jacksonville family law firm and having a will drawn up. You’ll want to decide who will raise them if anything happens to you and your spouse. 

Where Will You Live?

Are you planning on finding a new place together, or are you going to move into one of your current homes? You may also want to talk about where you want to settle down. What would you do if one of you got a big job promotion, but it required you to move to another state?

Who Handles the Money?

You should talk about whether you plan to have separate accounts or joint accounts. Figure out who is going to pay the bills and do your taxes. You may also want to go ahead and sit down a make a budget together.

It may seem easier to ignore these big decisions and just enjoy the bliss of the engagement phase, but putting these discussions off until after the wedding can end up being disastrous. If you aren’t sure how to approach these topics, consider attending premarital counseling. After all, it’s best to know what you’re getting into before you take the big leap. 

Strategies to Make a Marital Separation More Bearable

The end of a marriage can feel like a difficult and heartbreaking hurdle for couples. Regardless of the circumstances, this is a hard process for all parties involved, as this is the last chapter of two intertwined lives. While this can be a painful and challenging task, consider these tips that can help make your divorce a bit more bearable.

Photo by Eric Ward on Unsplash

Consider Your Options

While divorces are most often known for being resolved with two lawyers, courtrooms and numerous battles, there are other options. Whether you had a prenuptial agreement in place or if you prefer to handle this more civilly by having a mediator Diamond Bar CA who manages the process, you need to know that you have options and not all marriages end under the stress of a courtroom. Depending on the situation, you may have more civil options.

Mind Your Own Care

Divorces, even in the best of circumstances can leave you feeling raw and wounded. The end of this chapter can present emotional challenges to all those involved, and you will need to also make time to take care of yourself during all of this. Having a support system in place, deciding what you truly want from the divorce and taking time to heal will all be important steps of navigating this transitional period.

Be Mindful of Relationships

While divorces often have the most impact on the couple involved, there are also impactful implications for those around them. You both need to avoid dragging others into this. While having a support system will be critical, avoid putting those people in the middle. Not only is this uncomfortable, but it can also cause harm to the people around you. Consider developing parameters around those relationships and sticking to those boundaries.

Separations and divorces in marriages are terrible situations to have to deal with, even in the most ideal situations. While emotions are likely to run high, keep in mind that there are healthier ways to navigate these paths. With support, boundaries and options, you can proceed in a healthy way.